If A Couple Agrees On Everything, One Of The Partners Thinks For Both

No couple, no matter how strong, wise and respectful their relationship is, will always agree in every aspect, in every detail and nuance of their day.

A couple comes to agreements. A strong and mature relationship is one that allows us to respect differences so that, through dialogue and good commitment, union can be built.

You may also have heard of the typical person who, full of enthusiasm, tells us that “Me and my partner never argue and agree on everything we do ”.

To this type of phrase is usually added the “we are soul mates” . Without a doubt, it’s really exciting to think like that, that there are couples who don’t have any difference and breathe harmony in their daily lives.

However, we all know that this kind of perfect reality doesn’t exist. Furthermore, this aspect is not restricted to relationships only.

Friends also have their differences and like each other in the same way. In addition, within every well-built family there are discussions, differences of opinion, sometimes insurmountable, but even so, there is coexistence and respect.

If a couple is always in agreement, one of them holds the power

It can seem negative and even irritating to many people. Is it really so strange that a couple harmonizes 100% in all aspects of their personality, passions and thoughts?

The answer is yes. What happens when we see two people who never argue and don’t need to come to terms because there are no discrepancies? What happens is that either of them holds the power of the relationship and exercises it relentlessly.

the power in the relationship

Something we should be aware of is that in every relationship there is a little power play. Far from seeing this as a problem, in reality, it is an exchange of forces in which we know each other better and define positions.

• It is possible that one member of the relationship is the one who always disputes everything. The other person learns, in turn, to manage this situation in order to bring discrepancies to a calmer environment, where agreements can be reached.
• However, in some cases, there is not even room for differences. It’s all or nothing. “Either you agree with what I think, opine and decide, or we’re done.”
• In the latter cases, we have two options: give in or leave the relationship. The complex part of all this is that there are people to whom love is too heavy to simply say goodbye.

• They decide to “give in”. They prefer to remain silent, accept and not object, as “letting go” allows them to maintain the relationship.

Thinking differently, having the same goal

As we can deduce, no relationship based on the power of a single person can be successful or happy. As much as we strive to “want to be in agreement” with the person we love, it’s impossible.

• We must understand that not agreeing on certain aspects does not mean that our partner wants us less, or that we love him less.
• Love is not magically coinciding with someone so that everything fits neatly together. The real power and the real beauty of a relationship is respecting our differences to come to terms.
• Also, the mere fact that we have different interests can be enriching. It helps us to have other points of view, learn from each other and broaden perspectives.

Reaching agreements, a matter of will and reciprocity

We know that in our language the words “discuss” or “have differences” sound very negative.

• However, it is time to understand that this is the only way for the relationship to evolve, for every bond with someone to be healthy, sincere and dynamic. We have to learn to manage our differences.
• In order to reach adequate agreements and points of convergence, there must be an authentic recognition of the other. “I understand your needs and your views and I respect you.”
• Aspects such as empathy and active listening are essential, especially in an affectionate relationship.

• These are aspects based on a complete emotional openness in order to see the other person as part of oneself, to listen to them authentically.

Furthermore, the value of reciprocity is the essential ingredient that must form the substrate of any relationship.  Therefore, it is to understand that love is not just giving, it is also necessary to receive, give in, understand, respect…

All of this should make us understand that every couple is capable of reaching agreements for the common good, which undoubtedly results in a happier and more lasting bond.

It’s worth working on.

So, did you like this article? So, continue on our page with more tips for your well-being.